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| The Blind Leading the Blind: Why You Really Need a Coach |
The Blind Leading the Blind: Why You Really Need a Coach
Patsi Krakoff
© Copyright 2004
Most successful people are self-directing and self-managing. They take initiative and they have discipline. They know their strengths and weaknesses. They have action plans to follow in order to avoid procrastination and keep on track with goals.
Then why would successful people seek out the services of a coach? Why do so many executives - who are already in top positions - demand an executive coach as part of their benefits package? Because they know from experience that even their highly refined ability to see what is needed is limited by their own assumptions and beliefs.
It is like the blind leading the blind when you only have yourself to turn to. The problem is that we all use our inner assumptions and beliefs to make decisions. We are driven by motivations and values that are outside our own awareness.
Let's define further here what we need to discuss:
Beliefs
Beliefs are the assumptions we make about ourselves, about others in the world and about how we expect things to be. Beliefs are about how we think things really are, what is really true and what to expect as likely consequences that will follow from our behavior.
Values
Values are about how we have learnt to think things ought to be or people ought to behave, especially in terms of qualities such as honesty, integrity and openness.
Basic Assumptions
Basic assumptions are our long-learnt, automatic responses and established opinions. We are almost always unaware of the nature of our own basic assumptions, but they are enacted through our behavior - what we say and do. Basic assumptions are usually rooted in our infancy, early family life and social context. More widely, assumptions shaping our behavior relate to cultural context.
Attitudes
Attitudes are the established ways of responding to people and situations that we have learned, based on the beliefs, values and assumptions we hold. Attitude become manifest through our behavior.
There are two kinds of beliefs that operate behind the scenes, so to speak:
1. Empowering beliefs: these are related to excellence and how it can be achieved.
2. Limiting beliefs: these are the beliefs you have that limit your behaviors; even though your behavior is not what you want, you don't believe you can change it, for one reason or another.
(Source: www.1000ventures.com )
Have you ever tried to draw or paint a self-portrait? Even if you are artistic and talented, this is a very difficult task. To take a look at your assumptions and beliefs by yourself, and to explore them - examine them for their usefulness and value, is even harder to do - if not impossible.
Both our social and work habits have been built on assumptions. Even our relationships and marriages operate on beliefs formed from our early histories. And while circumstances may have changed since the start of these practices, their continued use tends to reconfirm the old beliefs - they often still feel right to us. We keep on doing what we have always done, and expect different results!
A coach can help you see what you can't see yourself. A good coach will ask the right kinds of questions - the kinds you can't answer right away, the ones that make you think. If you only have yourself as a coach, you may be missing an opportunity to explore beyond your assumptions and beliefs, both the limiting and empowering ones.
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Patsi Krakoff, Psy. D., CBC, is a psychologist, executive coach, and writer. She customizes newsletters for life and executive coaches, providing both content and PDF and HTML ezines for busy professionals.
Other articles can be viewed at http://www.customizednewsletters.com .
Patsi lives and works from Ajijic, Mexico where she plays tennis daily, and enjoys other creative activities with her husband Rob and two Maine Coon cats, Huey and Dewey.
Email: Patsi@customizednewsletters.com .
For more articles, subscribe to Newsletter Matters, send an email to: dr.patsi-45475@autocontactor.com .
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